First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
