you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
You're wonderful. How are you always such a good friend?
50% genetics, 50% driven by a desire for people to drunkenly eat donuts at my funeral and then have fantastic cry-sex afterward.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
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