just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
