you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
