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That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
