She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
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