Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
Randomize
