erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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