i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
Randomize
