her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
