their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
