Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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