he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
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