don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize
