these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
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