You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
I intend to get homeless drunk
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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