So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize
