i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
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