I want to make a zoo with you.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
You dont lie about slip and slides
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
Randomize
