I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Randomize
