he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
Randomize
