Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
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