i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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