he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
