their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
True college students do jello shots in the library
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
