I wish I only lived at night.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
