We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Randomize