i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
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