im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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