I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
