bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Randomize
