She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
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