After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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