i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
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