omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
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