We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
