I wannas sexs uuuuu
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
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