Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
