Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
There's even glitter on my cock...
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