I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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