When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
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