Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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