the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
