I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
