I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
So I stole cocaine from one of my Tinder hookups
And that is the most millennial sentence I've ever said
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