glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
Randomize
