he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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