We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
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