Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
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