Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
Randomize
