Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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