good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
